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Women and Busses

Posted at 1:09 AM
By: Brian [link]
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I took the shuttle to class this morning. Usually, you would expect something called a "shuttle" to stop at two or more destinations. Not here though. Our shuttle just keeps moving until someone walks up front and slams on the breaks for the driver. Even then, its tough getting the doors open.

Why take the shuttle then? Because I had to get to class in 2 minutes. Normally this is a 10 to 15 minute walk, but with the shuttle, its 5 minutes, and I get to overhear the cell-phone conversations of tired, and pissed, freshmen girls as they talk to their mom/best friend back home/boyfriend/future sorority "sister" -- and they are always pissed, because somebody will inevitably commit a horrible social faux pas, that they'll be forced to tell anyone who will listen to them about.

Girls have two types of phone conversations, the "I love you/miss you, puppy-love-voice" calls (type a), and the "oh my god, I can't believe (s)he did/said/drank that! WTF!" calls (type b). 90% of the time, girls are either having one of these conversations, or waiting for someone to call them so they can have these conversations. Sometimes they make fun of the target of the type a call, usually this results in maniacal laughter -- the joke is never that funny.

Occasionally, two or more girls will be in such close proximity that a phone call just wouldn't make sense. In these cases, they might attempt to carry on these same "private" conversations in the presence of others, through what I like to call a "huddle." They lean in close to each other, and whisper. Once again, they find their conversations to be very interesting. No man ever would.

Don't attempt to break these habits in women, however; it seems that they are quite instinctual. It would be like trying to train a dog to starve itself.

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