Thanksgiving dinner in the dining hall... ah yes, the horribly, and incomprehensibly mistimed celebration of a major national holiday, dining services style! There's something about my meal plan that makes me oh-so-giddy just thinking about the prospects of Dining-hall turkey, "chunky" mashed potatoes (by which they mean unmashed and mixed with white-shit brand potato substitute), and oh god, we can't forget the "duck," which, although labeled as poultry, looked suspiciously like pork to me. This is a Catholic school, so, hey, they were probably just playing a trick on the Jewish kid (haha, made you sin! Now you're going to hell! And for the grand finale, the potato-substitute is made of HIV!).

Anyway, I thought it was a grand idea to stuff my gut with turkey (natures most powerful sedative), before heading off to one of my signature night classes (because waking up before noon is like dying). Who needs to be conscious anyway? What would I miss? The learning? hahaha! I always miss that part of the class.

On the good note, however, they provided me with pumpkin pie, and for this I am grateful, because no one, not even the worst cafeteria in the world can create an inedible pumpkin pie. If its got pumpkin and cinnamon, I'll eat it. It's my only weakness. You could put it in front of me, and tell me that the secret ingredients are cyanide and rat poison, and as long as the pumpkin and cinnamon are still in it, I'll take a bite.

Can't let it go to waste... mmmmm.... pie....

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