Its not often that I will sit here and type a veritable commercial for a domestic product. In fact, usually, I tend to discourage their use at all costs. Anything that results in me or my surroundings being clean must be the devil, as it uses some sort of black magic to exorcise the well-ingrained odors caused by a collegiate lifestyle.

However, Febreeze and its cheaper workalikes is a godsend in college. It can be used in more ways than anything else you own. Whenever something smells like ass, Febreeze is there to make is smell like daisies... or at least Daisies growing in someone's ass. This is truly indispensable in a communal living situation, because people and their shit smell pretty bad.

Sleep in too late? Don't have time for a shower? Just spritz your odoriferous bits and bobbles with a heaping dose of the stuff. Its also good for when your roommate hasn't showered in a month - just fill your supersoaker with it, and pick a fight. You won't technically make anyone any cleaner, but you'll at least make them smell less like roadkill.

Additionally, Febreeze can clear out the evil spirits from that oft-farted-upon couch or seat of any sort. Also useful for spraying down your laundry bin when it starts to ferment. See, now you REALLY don't have to do your laundry this week. I just saved you a buck seventy-five. I rule like that.

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Click my links if you love me, and honk if you're horny.

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