I was sitting in my friend's room with my hand in a large bag full of raw meat today. There really isn't a much greater delight than raw dried beef soaked in teriyaki sauce. Jerky is one of those delights that really makes a difference in a man's life -- usually this difference is between 5 and 10 inches around his waist, but nonetheless, it is a good one. If you don't believe me, ask your local Dockers salesperson.

I was eating jerky, and sitting around, acting like the awesome man that I am, and pondering... "What am I going to do this summer?" Now, I have my options, of course -- I can get that big-money job over at Burger King, or perhaps, if I am lucky, someone will let me be the vomit-mopper at my local amusement park. This summer, I plan on climbing up that ladder!

Maybe, just maybe, if I work hard enough as a vomit mopper, they will promote me to the heights of large-mammal-crap-shoveler by the end of the summer. Realistically, the possibilities in today's job market for a college student seeking employment this summer are endless.

Forget about internships, who needs em? Why bother trying to get ready for a career, when you can start training for a job more suited to the skills you are gaining with that $140,000 Liberal Arts degree?

Move over wall street, hello french-fryer!

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Clickety-clickety... You know what to do... They are "Extra-Good," and if you want, I'll even make them ribbed for your pleasure...

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