CollegeBlows.com:Enemy of the Academic: A Lesson in Contradiction

Enemy of the Academic

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Wednesday, February 04, 2004

A Lesson in Contradiction

Posted at 1:05 AM
By: Brian [link]
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Let us imagine for a moment that you were assigned to give a short speech on an emotionally charged issue. Lets also suppose that you, previously encouraged by your progress in the class decided to tackle an important hot-button issue. Lets pretend that this issue happened to be racial stereotypes.

Now, when your thesis is that stereotypes are an evil that must be eliminated, it would seem to be a bad thing to open with a polish joke. Then again, when you just plain can't help yourself, you do. You might continue on by making fun of Asians, Jews, and right as the black guy in the front row is about to dial the NAACP, you toss in a few jokes about how white guys can't dance or play basketball.

You know it is a bad speech when the professor is banging his head on the desk and saying, "oh god, oh god." Don't try to explain yourself by saying, "but hey, I love minorities, I even rubbed one out to Halle Berry!" Somehow you seem to lose credibility.

So, if you think that that is all awful, well, fuck you, because that was my morning in a nutshell. Hell, I know it was "wrong," but then again, so is everything that I say, I've been the devils advocate since Al Pacino played the devil.

In other news, I have a "quiz" tomorrow, on god knows what. I don't even remember going to the class that I have the quiz in. I'm not fully positive that I am registered for that section, and damned if I know what the professor looks like. Nonetheless, my sources tell me that I have to take this thing, so tomorrow, I will be rolling out of bed at the unholy hour of 11am to drag my white ass across campus, where I will allow the bullshit to ooze from my pours onto the very paper before me, forming what will eventually be such a crowning achievement of bullshitdom that it will surely be framed and exhibited at the Guggenheim, or perhaps the Louvre.

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