There are a lot of movies that I really love. I can even quote some of them, and thats okay, because I am a man, and the testosterone doesn't give me a choice but to memorize movie quotes. Just like it doesn't give me the choice whether or not I want to have facial hair, or whether or not I want murder people when the kicker for my favorite football team misses TWO field goals in a row, either of which would have resulted in a massive upset, and pissed on the world. (Sorry about that, but it wasn't my choice, it was my testicles writing that...)

Anyway, where was I going...

Oh yes, movies. So yeah, there are a multitude of movies that I really dig. Some are serious, most are comedies, but I have to say that it's been about 15-16 years since anything by Disney was in my top-20. Not that this is a rant about Disney, that'll be another week. I just don't like Disney movies because their comedy blows. I mean, the problem is that they try to be family-friendly -- any comedy that doesn't offend good churchgoing, PAX-network watching, Pat Robertson donating American's with "family values" is crap.

Comedy is supposed to poke fun at reality, anyone who is warped enough to believe that the retarded humor stylings of the Walt-Disney Corporation are a jab at society needs to be locked up.

Back on point -- I just witnessed a lot (less than a hundred, but still) of British college-students drooling over the Disney-craptacular, Cool Runnings. Now, I'll give you that John Candy was a great dude and all... but I mean, seriously. Not only is the humor of the movie provided by a Rastafarian who repeatedly prat-falls, but its provided by a Rastafarian who is NEVER SEEN SMOKING THE REEFER. Let me reiterate that this is a RASTAFARIAN! Rastas do two things that must be made fun of in order for them to be comic relief: 1) Wear a big Rasta-hat, and 2) Puff the Cheebah.

Its like having a comic-relief Asian who also happens to be a good driver (or bad at Math).

Anyway, those crazy Brits just ate it up, I wondered why nobody was getting drunk... Then again... maybe they were drunk.

Well, that explained it.

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Keep clicking links and checking back. I'm headed out to Glasgow (or the Glasgow-Metro-Area, anyway) for the weekend to visit some family. Not that it matters.

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