Toronto supposedly doesn't have SARS anymore, and it isn't yet a part of the USA (just wait till those Canadians screw up though, then their city will be as American as Mexico City! Nonetheless, Toronto still remains as an interesting travel prospect for this spring break. This is, of course, for the following reasons:

1) Its Cheap: $20 dollars a night, ladies and gentlemen, $15 if you don't mind a couple (thousand) cockroaches. Don't forget that cheap Canadian beer is actually even cheaper when you are IN CANADA. Don't forget that our money is worth more than their money, which means that when the sign outside a Canadian bar says, "two dollar drafts," that doesn't apply to American's, who, in their own currency will end up paying less than $2 for their beer.

2) The Jokes: It would give me a chance to whip out my excellent Queen Elizabeth jokes, that nobody here in America would get. For example: "What did Queen Elizabeth eat for dinner last night? A dead baby!" Trust me, it'll kill up there in Canada.

3) It's Party Central: I admit it, I made this one up, but who knows, it COULD be party central, if people start partying up there. So, eh, unless you already have plans, the party is in Toronto, we'll do some shots, we'll throw a rave, hell, maybe we'll even have a "frozen T-shirt" contest.

4) It Isn't Home: Family is great and all, but who really wants to spend their Spring Break at home? I mean, the proper length of time for a trip home is just long enough for your laundry to be washed. By the time your clothes are clean, the following things will have happened, that make it no longer worth it to stay (at least if you are me): you're dad will tell you to get a haircut, an act that would destroy that "just rolled out of bed hungover" look that you have been cultivating for the past semester; you're sister will pick a fight with you over where you parked the car, apparently, that's her space now; your Playstation will overheat because (due to boredom) you have been playing it non-stop since you got home. All of this adds up to one thing: you need to go somewhere...

5) I was too lazy to book early: Yeah, thats right, all of the "cool" places were taken, because I waited until... well, actually, I haven't technically booked anything yet, but you're damn right I intend on going somewhere.

So, if anyone wants to join the greatest party to ever hit a Toronto dive bar, then head on up to Canada, my second, or third favorite North American country.

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