CollegeBlows.com:Enemy of the Academic: Welcome Hawk Hoop Supporters

Enemy of the Academic

[Make a New Post]

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Welcome Hawk Hoop Supporters

Posted at 11:13 PM
By: Brian [link]
Email This Post

Welcome to my Hawk Hoop Supporting visitors, it was so very nice of you to link to me, even though you chose an update that applied to LAST YEAR, when your St. Joes Hawks were actually succeeding.

Moving along though...

This month has taught me a number of lessons:

1) Firstly, I have learned that no matter what I do, I am going to spend far more money doing it than I would have otherwise hoped.

2) Secondly, I have learned that no matter where I carry a book, or how bored I might make myself, I will never actually study it, instead I will take a hearty nap, then locate a pair of boobies to stare at until it is time to take a nap again.

3) I have learned that "POT" Noodles, while resembling ramen noodles in many ways, are infinitely more difficult to prepare in a way that causes them to appear to be edible, and even more difficult to actually make edible.

4) I have also learned that POT Noodles never actually can constitute a meal. They don't even constitute a snack. As far as food goes, they don't count. They're like the penny you swallowed as a kid, or those deliciously edible "non-toxic" Crayolas.

Armed with this new knowledge, I come to realize, as I do every semester, that I am essentially fucked. So, I try to concentrate my energy on more exciting tasks, such as inquiring into different ways I can sell my soul to corporate America for a few bucks. By that I mean, trawling ads on Craigslist.com and emailing various parties about seedy-seeming job offers, or even (hurray!) ways to profit from this site (usually by completely whoring myself out).

On that note, did you know that you can buy flowers for low, low prices at...

You know what? I'm not even going to go there.

---
Click on some of my extra-good links, or (if you love me, or are from that Hawk Hoops site) you can always email me at Brian[at]CollegeBlows.com for the fans and Hatemail[at]CollegeBlows.com for the emails that will get ignored (unless you leave yourself WIDE open to be berated on the internet -- which I reserve the right to do with all email).